you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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