They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Acid is not a monday night drug
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Randomize
