She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
