So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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