We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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