HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
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