It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
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