my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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