marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Randomize
