Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Randomize
