Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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