he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize
