Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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