If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
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