Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
