you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize