miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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