that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
