Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Randomize
