at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
