never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize