also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Randomize
