I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
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