it hurts more in the daytime
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
