My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
