Soap is not a condiment
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
we're so committed to being not committed
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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