he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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