he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Farmville is her only friend.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
