Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Randomize
