Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
he told me I talked like a deaf person
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
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