fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
