you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
