Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
