Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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