I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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