Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Randomize
