The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
