Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Randomize
