did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
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