Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I think my vagina is haunted
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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