We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
