he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
