You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Never underestimate the power of titties
The air taste purple.
Randomize
