im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Randomize
