I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
