pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
God, you're like boner-b-gone
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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