Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize