I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
They have beer where we have blood.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
