Nicole vs. Life
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
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