well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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