OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Randomize
