So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Randomize
